First Full Day Sans The Classes

Move-in yesterday as amazingly not stressful or crazy like I thought it would be. It did take a long time but it wasn't really had. I think the fact that I packed my stuff in many smaller boxes was better than only having a couple huge ass boxes. I moved in pretty quickly and got my books. Unpacking and organizing took a little longer but it got it all done and now my dorm feels as homey as it gets.
Roomie is nice, no horror stories here, nothing crazy or out of the ordinary to tell. I think I am very lucky considering I know people that are dealing with having their apartments be party central (with an increased possibility of someone puking on the couch)and drunken roommates coming in at ungoodnessly hours of the night.
Speaking of which, I came in at 2am last night.
There were people walking like on the street just outside my dorm just wearing over sized t-shirts, it seriously looked like the had no pants on. It was slightly creepy and definitely odd.
Anyways, so today was the first morning I woke up as a college student on campus. I walked around finding the buildings where my classes are gonna be located. It was pretty ridiculous. I took like 45 minutes getting to a building that is 15 minutes away from my dorm. Hopefully I will get used to it. I had lunch in the cafeteria for the first time (The line set-up was, by the way completely dysfunctional!). The food was mediocre but not something I would want to repeat more than once or twice a week. Tomorrow I'll go to another place since tonight I am getting free food.
I expected this week for campus to be overflowing with people and activities and stuff but really most of these events are pretty small... well smaller than I imagined. I think the one tonight might be bigger though, since it's primary function is to feed college students free food.
I also went to wal-mart... nothing much to tell there.... I just for some odd reason forgot to pack soap and laundry detergent, I am also thinking I might need dish washing soap at one point.
Anyways, first day of classes is on Monday, I am pretty nervous. I've been doing some pre-reading but I'm so scared of not being prepared.

Dipping My Toes In The Water

It's not letholigica.....
It's that Fish Camp was truly indescribable.
I honestly have to say that I was scared out of my mind and ridiculously nervous, mainly fearing that I wouldn't fit in. I walked in there with my guard up, telling myself that none of the people surrounding me would want to see the real me because they have never dealt with the shit I have.
That is a fault of mine that I know I need to work on.
I always assume people are just unable to understand me because they haven't lived what I have lived.
Either which way, fish camp broke that barrier. It was so strange and relieving to be totally open in front of pretty much complete strangers. I might have been more open with them then I have been in the past in front of those closest to me. There were so many experiences that where shared and I learned that it is not strange or odd to have crap to deal with on a daily basis.
Sure, I still felt weird, there was the lingering hesitation in the back of my head that never failed to remind me that rejection was a possibility.
There were moments when I felt it, a weird unity that is often mentioned, and I got goosebumps in my arms. Indescribable camaraderie apparently will do that to you, the feeling of knowing you are not alone and the fear of accepting that.
I met many cool people, got compliments on my hat and did not feel brainwashed at the end of it all, exhausted maybe, but not brain washed.
I wish I had packed another pair of sneakers and participated more openly in the special events though.
So bottom line, fish camp transmitted indescribable feelings and overall it got me super excited.
Move-in is on Sunday and I am not done packing :( so I need all the time I can get. However, I just want to jump into it and get over it, take the dive into the fish pond.

Side note: Coming from a very small class with a small selection of attractive guys, fish camp was like O_O, yeah that was pretty much my face. So much eye candy....it was great really... now I feel like a creeper

Sex Doesn't Guarantee Wisdom

I was a bible study a couple of weeks ago and something that the leader said really stood out to me
"Age doesn't guarantee wisdom"
It just made so much sense. I wrote it down, and stored it in my mind.
I wish people could realize that sex doesn't guarantee wisdom either.
I hate how people think that sex will open up all this knowledge of life to you and somehow transform you into a mature, real, human being. Am I the only one who thinks this is absolute madness?? How is having sex supposed to affect you as a person in completely unrelated ways? How much more are you really going to know after it happens? It's not like afterward, every life question is answered and you finally know everything. Sure you will experience new things physically and emotionally but they really don't go outside the the category of sex and human interaction.
I guess the reason why I am bringing this up is because as soon as anyone hears I am a virgin, they instantly assume I am pure and innocent and naive or some shit like that. I am not stupid or prude, I am perfectly aware of what sex is and I like that I have chosen not to have it at this point in my life! Seriously people, I like to drink my weight in vodka yet being a virgin makes me angelic? wtf???
Why does the fact that I have never done it effect people's opinions of me? I have been told that I am a generally nice person, I've also been called sweet, but I like to think that it is because that is just who I am and that those opinions wouldn't change if I wasn't a virgin.
Also, the fact that I am a virgin doesn't mean that I am dumb enough to believe everything a guy tells me, I know the kinds of things they will say to get in my pants. Just because they haven't succeeded in doing so doesn't mean they haven't tried.
Is it weird of me to think that virgins can be just as guy-savvy as non-virgins? is that just idealistic thinking?
On another note, how come girls seem to segregate and judge each other based on the virgin thing? why does that have to matter so much? Sometimes I feel like virgins think that non-virgins are sluts (regardless of the number of partners or sexual encounters) and non-virgins think that virgins are little girls.
Doesn't make any sense to me whatsoever.