Life [lahyvz]
noun, plural lives.
-the condition that distinguishes organisms from inorganic objects and dead organisms, being manifested by growth through metabolism, reproduction, and the power of adaptation to environment through changes originating internally.
Is this life? Just the scientific biological processes that the body goes through internally?
Not human life. Not my life.
This is so much more, it has to be. What is it though?
I work on a definition daily and I think it's that feeling that rushes into your stomach and spills out in a smile or a laugh and reaches upward filling your world with its energy. This is my time to experience life in a new way, not just to live it.
So I cherish those nights that bring me closer to strangers and surprise me and give me hope in humanity. I will dance on pool tables and hold hands with a handsome boy because I can and I want to.
They surprised me, why didn't they just leave me to my mistakes? to suffer the consequences of my actions? Why do they care? Who am I that they would?
I still can't grasp it, the idea, its too overwhelming and too beautiful... it has to be fake, right?
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Roadblock
Test week is next week :(, more importantly, CHEMISTRY TEST is next week.
Blergh >.< I hope I don't toally bomb it, that would prove to be dissapointing.
I am however, keeping up with all of my homeowork (would it be called dormwork?) and quizzes so that will hopefully help my grade out at the end of the semester.
My lessons for this week:
On that "to-do" list everyone tells you to make because it's so helpful, remember to put "sleep" on it. Seriously, for the first time in my life I am having to remind myself to re-charge the batteries. I was actually ridiculously proud of myself when I made the decision to hit the hay early (which means around 9-10pm) and wake up early to work on my chemistry before class. It was probably the best sleep I have gotten in a long time and I ended up waking up around 7:30am... since I dont have class until noon, that gave me plenty of time to finish up somethings.
On that note, lesson number two, the whole prioritizing thing people wont shut up about on those "how-to do college" books, it's totally true. However, I do think it would be best if they said to find a personal reason to prioritize and get your schoolwork done... mine just happens to be partying (Terrible, I know...but it works) I make a deal with myself on how much I have to get done with by friday night in order to do the social thing on the weekends.
Surprise surprise, it worked. I got my stuff done and now I can relax and enjoy that whole social part of college... which by the way is amazing.
More on that later.
Blergh >.< I hope I don't toally bomb it, that would prove to be dissapointing.
I am however, keeping up with all of my homeowork (would it be called dormwork?) and quizzes so that will hopefully help my grade out at the end of the semester.
My lessons for this week:
On that "to-do" list everyone tells you to make because it's so helpful, remember to put "sleep" on it. Seriously, for the first time in my life I am having to remind myself to re-charge the batteries. I was actually ridiculously proud of myself when I made the decision to hit the hay early (which means around 9-10pm) and wake up early to work on my chemistry before class. It was probably the best sleep I have gotten in a long time and I ended up waking up around 7:30am... since I dont have class until noon, that gave me plenty of time to finish up somethings.
On that note, lesson number two, the whole prioritizing thing people wont shut up about on those "how-to do college" books, it's totally true. However, I do think it would be best if they said to find a personal reason to prioritize and get your schoolwork done... mine just happens to be partying (Terrible, I know...but it works) I make a deal with myself on how much I have to get done with by friday night in order to do the social thing on the weekends.
Surprise surprise, it worked. I got my stuff done and now I can relax and enjoy that whole social part of college... which by the way is amazing.
More on that later.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Is This Thing On?
First official week of class and so far I feel small O_O mainly because of the huge number of people on campus. My classes are better though, I only have two gigantic ones, and in that case, it's actually a good thing. Avoidance is easier in large groups.
Any which way, my daily uniform has consisted of running shorts (I don't even run) and a t-shirt, not my usual atire and honestly not what I feel like myself in. However, class is class, I am there to learn, not to meet people or, sadly, feel like myself. Plus the lack of getting ready in the morning gives me about half an hour more to sleep.... sleep will always be above grooming on my list of priorities.
I have been working on my chemistry homework, the only thing I can really work on at this time mainly because I don't want to get more work and have that assignment looming in the back of my head like a dark cloud of confusing terms and ridiculous number rules. I am trying to like it, I swear. I know that with all the chemistry I am going to have to do in the future, the subject better become my best friend...fast.
Speaking of chemistry, I met a guy in my chem class from California, really random to find someone from Cali here so it was interesting. Just comes to show that there is really no telling who you will meet in college.
My walk to chem class was also pretty eventful. I saw a squirrel (yes, you read right) that was like pulling ninja skills on this group of people eating chips, it was impressive really. I also saw a guy preaching in the middle of a plaza with a large sign saying "YE MUST BE SAVED". I was actually worried about him since it looked like he had been out there for quite a while, I would have offered to buy him something but that would have made me late to class.
In other news, I am really enjoying my Psychology class and I think it's because I have a great teacher who makes it interesting and entertaining. However, I don't see myself converting to a PSYCH major any time soon. I think I am behind on one class but plan to come prepared for next week. Feeling unprepared is the worst feeling in the entire universe and I hope to never experience it again.
My roommate is out for the weekend and so I am left alone in my dorm room with very little to do but watch movies, read and do chem homework.... which is really perfectly fine.
I think I have made myself stand out to most of my teacher's so far, I do not want to become a number, a student they don't ever see until finals roll around and they are in desperate need of help... I think I have 2 teacher's I still have to work on.
I went dancing last night and really enjoyed myself, but really wish I had not been acting so high school and by that I mean reserved and insecure. I felt so crummy, there is just no room for that now that I am in college, there is no room for that for the rest of my life.
I had a crush and now I do believe it has extinguished which is all for the better. I want to have fun and do my own thing and get my stuff done so I can keep moving on. I have to remind myself that, unlike a lot of women who enter college, I am not here husband-hunting... no matter how much more atractive a guy becomes once I hear they are studying engineering.
Any which way, my daily uniform has consisted of running shorts (I don't even run) and a t-shirt, not my usual atire and honestly not what I feel like myself in. However, class is class, I am there to learn, not to meet people or, sadly, feel like myself. Plus the lack of getting ready in the morning gives me about half an hour more to sleep.... sleep will always be above grooming on my list of priorities.
I have been working on my chemistry homework, the only thing I can really work on at this time mainly because I don't want to get more work and have that assignment looming in the back of my head like a dark cloud of confusing terms and ridiculous number rules. I am trying to like it, I swear. I know that with all the chemistry I am going to have to do in the future, the subject better become my best friend...fast.
Speaking of chemistry, I met a guy in my chem class from California, really random to find someone from Cali here so it was interesting. Just comes to show that there is really no telling who you will meet in college.
My walk to chem class was also pretty eventful. I saw a squirrel (yes, you read right) that was like pulling ninja skills on this group of people eating chips, it was impressive really. I also saw a guy preaching in the middle of a plaza with a large sign saying "YE MUST BE SAVED". I was actually worried about him since it looked like he had been out there for quite a while, I would have offered to buy him something but that would have made me late to class.
In other news, I am really enjoying my Psychology class and I think it's because I have a great teacher who makes it interesting and entertaining. However, I don't see myself converting to a PSYCH major any time soon. I think I am behind on one class but plan to come prepared for next week. Feeling unprepared is the worst feeling in the entire universe and I hope to never experience it again.
My roommate is out for the weekend and so I am left alone in my dorm room with very little to do but watch movies, read and do chem homework.... which is really perfectly fine.
I think I have made myself stand out to most of my teacher's so far, I do not want to become a number, a student they don't ever see until finals roll around and they are in desperate need of help... I think I have 2 teacher's I still have to work on.
I went dancing last night and really enjoyed myself, but really wish I had not been acting so high school and by that I mean reserved and insecure. I felt so crummy, there is just no room for that now that I am in college, there is no room for that for the rest of my life.
I had a crush and now I do believe it has extinguished which is all for the better. I want to have fun and do my own thing and get my stuff done so I can keep moving on. I have to remind myself that, unlike a lot of women who enter college, I am not here husband-hunting... no matter how much more atractive a guy becomes once I hear they are studying engineering.
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